A Third View of Obfuscation

‘I may not be able to love but I force myself to pretend to believe in it … For the future I don’t have the slightest hope but I constrain myself to disseminate faith in that future, projecting it like a trompe l’oeil onto the pealing plaster of the school hall. I don’t have dreams, those I had have fallen from me … and yet I feel I have a duty to nourish those of young people […] I am hard with myself and soft with them. From them I expect everything, and for them everything good; of myself I don’t expect anything any more. I feel pity for everyone except for my own person. For myself I reserve a more perverse sentiment and a punishment that’s more subtle: I know that I am not happy, and I blame myself for that, and I condemn myself, by way of retaliation, to pretend that I am.’
(Antonio Scurati: Il sopravissuto)

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